Day 335: Being true to myself

The best advice I’ve had today, is to just be real, which is pretty good advice.

I like to believe I’m always true to myself, I’m a very genuine person. I don’t have ulterior motives and I don’t know how to manipulate anything.

You can call me simple minded but I like to think I am just a nice person trying to make my way through this world in the best way I know how.

The difference between me and most people is that I like to keep my thoughts to myself.

Saying I have a hard time putting myself out there is a huge understatement.

I am the eptiome of safe when it comes to relationships. With everything else, I’m ready for anything! I’ll try just about anything once.. sign me up!

A spontaneous trip, last minute happy hour, you name it, I’m almost always game.

I know being spontaneous and sharing pieces of myself can only be good, because if I don’t I’m forgetable.

Sharing a real piece of myself with my friends will only bring fantastic rewards, and there isn’t anything to lose, but I’m closed off.

I have a big wall up, and I’m not sure how to break it down.

I hate feeling vulnerable… absolutely hate it. I enjoy the security of my own world and knowing all my thoughts are locked inside my brain, only to be revealed to those I feel are safe. It gives me a sense of power knowing the other person doesn’t know what I’m thinking.

But that’s not good. I need to change my old habits.

The first thing I need to work on is verbalizing my feelings. Sometimes I don’t even know what I’m feeling unless I write it down, or sit down and think about it.

I have realized I’ve been feeling a little down in the dumps recently, and I’m not sure why.

I had a great friend visit, and I’m heading out of town for 5 days on a trip that is making all my friends jealous so why am I not happy?

I have absolutely no idea, but I would really like to break out of this ‘funk’.

So I need to make it happen because no one is going to do it for me.


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