Day 292: A mature date

So today was my get together with the might be gay guy… ok so I guess I should stop calling him that because after today I don’t think he is gay.

We met up for a margarita, and it was all I could do to muster my strength to get to the restaurant.

I am so exhausted, the party last weekend, and running around all week is killing me.

I’m not trying to say it’s tough to be me, I’m happy to have a lot going on, but I am starting to wonder if I’m too old for this.

I am not 26 anymore. Maybe there is something to be said for being content.

I managed to make it home, change clothes, and freshen up before heading to the restaurant to meet with the not so gay guy.

We had a good time learning about each other, telling stories, you know the drill.

I have to say it was refreshing and nice to not have to try to keep an octopus off me, and to have some adult conversation. What a concept.

At one point, he said ‘I feel like I’m being a dud, I’m so tired, I’m just not myself tonight’. I laughed and told him it was a good thing because I felt the same way.

It was refreshing to know we were both tired, like we shared some kind of common bond… and we do… age!

During the date the not so gay guy proceeded to tell me about his past relationships, girlfriends, etc. It was a little unorthodox, isn’t that one of the golden rules of dating?

Admitedly he wasn’t pining over them, just giving me the history of what led up to him being single at this point in his life.

I felt slightly compelled to tell him about Mr. Wonderful, but decided against it. It’s such a hard thing to bring up so early on, but then again, his past wasn’t so easy either.

At one point during the conversation, we started talking about finding the happy place in a bad situation and I danced around the topic a lot.

We also discussed sometimes life is best when you are just content. Always reaching for the golden ring can drive you crazy.

We called it a night and I came home and settled in for the night watching a little tv before going to bed.

I turned Kimmel on and when I saw Zac Efron was coming on the show I decided to stay up and watch. Since he’s been on the show, I’m interested to see how his other interviews go.

During the discussion about his new movie, he said something wise… ‘Sometimes you have to go through the sad place to find happiness.’

So true, although sometimes I wonder if I will ever let myself be free enough to actually feel that happiness without being scared of it getting ripped out from under me again.


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