Day 123: The tapeworm is back…

The PMS tapeworm is back.

I ate pretty reasonably all day long, and then the afternoon hit and so did my chocolate craving… again.

The older I get the worse the PMS becomes. From the grumpiness to the cravings and the tapeworm it’s getting bad.

Yesterday my sweet tooth kicked in and all I wanted was a piece of delicious confectionary delight, but all I had in the wallet was a $20 bill which meant I had to go on a scavenger hunt.

I took a look back on the Cheerleader’s desk and saw a bag of chocolate covered pomegranate seeds… jackpot!

I snapped it up, but as soon as I grabbed it I realized something was wrong. I opened it up and it was empty.

There wasn’t even so much as a crumble of chocolate inside that bag. I swear she licked it clean, and if I know her… I’m pretty sure she did.

Today I was pretty much in the same boat, with the exception of the 55 cents in my wallet. Not enough for chocolate but combined with the change in my desk drawer I could squeeze out a Diet Dr. Pepper which would have to do.

I walked back to my desk and saw another co-worker who always has a sweet tooth. I knew she had candy… I stalked her like a rabid dog and thankfully she let me dig in. 2 mini-snickers did the trick.

But by the time I was heading home the tapeworm was back. I needed food and a lot of it… pronto!

I stopped by Outback Steakhouse, and ordered my steak dinner. Filet, baked potato, salad and mini-lobster tails and I downed it all… along with a few glasses of wine left by one of the guests on the show.

All in all a good night, until I checked my mail.

I opened a letter from the company that manages our timecards and vacation benefits. It was a notice that my medical insurance ended at the end of the year.

What?! They mailed me an insurance card for the new year what was all of this about??

Then I remembered back to last week when I suddenly lost access to some of our shared files at work, and the personal folders in my email.

I immediately called the IT department and they came over to check things out. Evidently someone else at the company with the same last name was let go and they shut off my accounts by mistake.

Could they be related? The date on the letter corresponded to the date of her firing.

Perfect. It’s exactly what you want to hear a day before your first ever ski trip.

I think I need more chocolate to deal with this.


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